Parenting – We are Windhams

When we told the kids about my breast cancer, each took it in their own way.

Julia, our scientist, immediately tied the information to an episode of Magic School Bus on bad cells and germs. Hannah, in many ways, the heartbeat of our family, thought cancer might be contagious and wondered how she might catch it. Joseph… well Joseph just got really quiet.

Joseph is only 4 years old – so it’s still hard to fully understand what he’s thinking.

But, as our close friends and his teachers will tell you – my breast cancer has really impacted him in a way that breaks a momma’s heart.

He’s scared. He’s scared that I’ll die. He’s scared that he will grow up without his mama. He’s scared that his life will change even more than it already has.

We have a great support team in place for him and plan to have him participate in Wonders and Worries, a support group for kids dealing with a parent’s cancer.

But, we know that his little heart still hurts. We continually remind him that he’s safe, loved, and will always be cared for.

God is sooo Big!

Just ask Joseph how much God loves him or how much his daddy loves him and he will give you the “Windham” answer.

“Too much!”

We say that in our house because it’s impossible to understand the love of a father (and mother!). It’s just “too much!”

So last night, around midnight, our door slowly opened followed by the padding of little feet on the carpet.

“Mama, Daddy, I having trouble sweeping.”

(he’s 4, so it’s kinda cute that he doesn’t know how to form the letter “l” – sweeping… I WISH he was having trouble sweeping!)

So Joseph asked to crawl into our bed. And while this isn’t an uncommon occurrence, we weren’t prepared for this –

Turns out, in his stand of solidarity for me, Joe Joe has also taken to wearing a cap to bed.

I mean, seriously, let’s just talk about the cuteness factor of this little guy. He may not always know how to verbally express exactly how he’s feeling in this new journey, but holy cow, he makes my heart overflow.

So, there we were, all snuggled in bed. Joe Joe and I in our little night caps. All nice and cozy.

And warm.

Though, as it turns out, that extra hint of warmness was Joseph peeing the bed…no joke!

Still. Good Lord! You gotta love this boy.

The truth is – we never planned to have three kids. Kids are a lot of work. Frankly, they can be a pain in the butt with very little reward, too. Or so it seemed.

So why three?

Our oldest, Julia, spent the first 6 months of her life being extremely fussy and hard to comfort. But, dang, that girl was cute.

(Julia, Spring 2008) Those legs, yo. Big, fatty thighs. Delish.

Despite the sleepless nights and the colic crying, we knew one thing beyond all doubt – we make awesome babies and the world needed more of them.

We got pregnant when Julia was 9 months old. We didn’t expect it to happen so fast, but true to her personality, Hannah is an unstoppable force.

Once we had both girls, parenting became a puzzle – fitting all the pieces of joy, hardship, frustration, exuberance, together to make this beautiful design.

But a piece was missing to our jigsaw puzzle.

The night Joseph was born, our puzzle was complete. He was the missing piece that put everything together. Now, with all three kids, we were a family.

The truth is – we never planned to have three kids.

We never expected to have our world flipped around with the birth of each of the kids. We never expected to have our world rocked quite so. Yet, we also never expected to have so much freaking fun. Kids are a lot of work. Frankly, they can be a pain in the ass too. But, these three kids of ours have been worth every minute of our lives.